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A Graduation Gift That Changed a Young Grad's Fortune

Lizzie wasn't your average college senior. But she also wasn't anything spectacular. Solid grades, a cute smile and plenty of friends - but, like many college students her age, she wasn't sure where she was going in life. She hadn't had a steady boyfriend and other than a wild Spring Break night in Tijuana with a young local stud and a midget pony, her love life had been somewhat underwhelming. As senior week approached, a large mysterious box appeared unannounced at her Sorority's front door. The package was unassuming except for a shiny purple envelope attached. Lizzie quickly opened the envelope to find a day glow pink note card with cursive writing. It read, "Dear Lizzie, The NIPYATA! changed my...

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“She Put the Piñata on a Pedestal”

She got a Nipyata for her party, and as she strung it up, the mystique hung heavy in the hot summer air.  The guests, intrigued at the sight, whispered quietly to each other, "What could it contain?"  "Who would be the one to open it?"  "When is this happening?"  As a warm breeze blew through the trees, the Stay Classy Burrito swayed and swung around revealing the bright, bold NIPYATA! logo, and the party erupted into thunderous cheers.  The echoes bounced off the surrounding houses, causing dogs to bark, birds to flock from trees, and irate neighbors to shout “SHUT UP!” from their windows.  The party guests raised their hands, fists clenching bottles and pumping them in the air in a reverential...

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Is a $400 Booze Pinata from NIPYATA! the Lit Christmas Gift of 2016?

NIPYATA! just released their most luxurious product yet- a 40" tall Stack of Presents Pinata with 100 Nips inside! For a mere $399.99 this beauty can be yours.  Here are the FAQ on this beast of a Holiday Gift. Is this thing really worth $399???!!  Sure, $399 seems like a pretty penny. But when you factor in that it'll probably cost NIPYATA! $150 to ship this behemoth, you're getting a serious deal. And you'll instantly become the most desirable person at your Holiday Party or Family Christmas Weekend at home. Will people think I'm a total douche if I spend $400 on a booze pinata? Yes, many people will think you're a royal douche. But you probably don't want to...

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Here, Hold My Beer: Nipyata's Guide to Handling the Holiday Season Like a Pro

Holla holla daze, y'all!  This holiday season, everyone's stressed.  AF.  But you don't have to be.  The lifestyle experts on Nipyata!'s Wellness Team have devised a program to get you through this holiday season stress free.  Follow these five simple rules and you'll reach 2017 in peak physical and mental condition: 1.  Get online.  Skip the mall.  Skip the crowds. Skip traffic.  Point and click, point and click, point and click...BOOM, done!  Gifts for everyone!  And you haven't even had your coffee yet.  Now you have the rest of the day to get back online and watch porn...which is what you wanted to do anyway. 2.  Wear ugly sweaters.  Not just to an Ugly Sweater Party, but every day.  Wear them to work, brunch, church,...

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Talkin' shop with Applied Mechanics trade journal

Our chief design engineer sat down for a one-on-one with the trade journal “Applied Mechanics” and became increasingly agitated with the questions.  Partial transcript of the interview follows. .................................................................... Applied Mechanics:  Hi, thanks so much for taking the time today.  We’re fascinated with the latest pinatas and we’re excited to hear about how you go from initial concept to final production. Nipyata:  Thanks for having me.  How long will this take? AM:  15 minutes, maybe longer? N:  Let’s make it quick.  Care for a nip? AM:  Uh, it’s 10am, I think I’ll pass.  So, you’ve been with Nipyata! since the early days? N:  I’m having a nip.  The Company is only two years old, so I’d say they’re still in...

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